Undue Haste Makes Waste

Undue haste makes waste… so don’t be too eager to leave.

If you’re thinking about leaving your church, stop and take a breath, and realize that you may be taking the chance of trading one problem for something worse!  First, understand the purpose of the church. Acts 2:42 tells us what that is. “And they devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers.”

The purpose of the church is to be devoted to:

• The apostles’ teaching, also known as the Holy Scriptures.
• Fellowshipping with other Christians through regular church attendance.
• The Lord’s Supper, known as communion.
• Prayer, “Praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication. To that end, keep alert with all perseverance, making supplication for all the saints” (Ephesians 6:18).

But, can a church have all these attributes and still be non-Christian in their behavior?  ABSOLUTELY!!!

The church is where Christians are to learn biblical doctrine so that they can be grounded in their faith. It’s the place where fellow Believers remember their salvation through the Lord’s death, burial, and resurrection by observing the Lord’s Supper and baptism. It’s where Christians sing praises to the Lord and pray for one another.  It is also a place to fellowship as a Christian family.

However, sometimes there is spiritual danger that one needs to be mindful of. A church can practice these ordinances and appear to be Christian when, in fact, they are false in their devotion to the Lord.

Many so-called churches and denominations are filled with religious people and apostate leaders who practice Christian behavior. These leaders and congregants surround themselves with other religious people.  In doing so, it falsely confirms their salvation among themselves by reinforcing their religious beliefs and practices. The Bible calls them “lukewarm” or dead, having no true salvation in Christ. They may attend weekly worship services, prayer meetings and even be members or leaders in the church, but their devotion is only to themselves and one another, not to God.

How is this possible?  Most Christian colleges and seminaries have become nothing more than Bible trade schools.  Today’s pastors are trained in the art and science of Bible interpretation (hermeneutics) and have learned how to deliver biblical sermons.  These pastors shepherd religious people hold spiritual functions and gatherings and lead communion for religious purposes. Matthew 23:27 describes them as “whitewashed tombs, which outwardly appear beautiful, but within are full of dead people’s bones and all uncleanness.”

Matthew 24:24 also says, “For false christs and false prophets will arise and perform great signs and wonders, so as to lead astray, if possible, even the elect.” I used to think that this verse was only referring to the Charismatic Movement, but their teachings and antics are so outlandish that many Christians and non-Christians alike aren’t fooled by them. I believe that the false christs and prophets that Jesus is mainly referring to will look and act so biblical that if it weren’t for the sake of the Elect’s indwelling Holy Spirit, even the Elect could be led astray.

As my church experiences have expanded throughout the years, I have seen conservative pastors go astray with their congregations’ blessing! Such examples of this were misappropriation of church funds, hiring biblically unqualified men to be leaders or pastors, not preaching the full Gospel, and not protecting their flock from false doctrine.  All these churches had conservatively trained pastors, biblical statements of faith, and taught sound doctrine.

When is it biblically right to leave a church since the Bible doesn’t expound on this subject?  I agree with pastor John MacArthur when he says: 

“Leaving a church is not something that should be done lightly. Too many people abandon churches for petty reasons. Disagreements over simple matters of preference are never a good reason to withdraw from a sound, Bible-believing church. Christians are commanded to respect, honor, and obey those whom God has placed in positions of leadership in the church (Heb. 13:7, 17). However, there are times when it becomes necessary to leave a church for the sake of one’s conscience or out of duty to obey God rather than men. Such circumstances would include:

• If heresy on some fundamental truth is being taught from the pulpit (Gal. 1:7-9).
• If the leaders of the church tolerate seriously errant doctrine from any, who are given teaching authority in the fellowship (Rom. 16:17).
• If the church is characterized by a wanton disregard for Scripture, such as a refusal to discipline members who are sinning blatantly (1 Cor. 5:1-7).
• If unholy living is tolerated in the church (1 Cor. 5:9-11).
• If the church is seriously out of step with the biblical pattern for the church (2 Thess. 3:6, 14).
• If the church is marked by gross hypocrisy, giving lip service to biblical Christianity but refusing to acknowledge its true power (2 Tim. 3:5).” (When Should People Leave Their Church?)

I would also add another reason to leave a church is when church leadership disqualifies themselves through significant sin.  Church leadership is commanded to model themselves after the biblical qualifications listed in 1 Timothy 3:1-13, Titus 1:5-9, and 1 Peter 5:1-3.  If a leader can no longer meet these qualifications due to sin or changes in his life which prevent him from fulfilling his duty to these Scriptural mandates, he needs to step down.

Before choosing to leave a church over a sin issue, you first have the scriptural obligation to confront the sin. Refusing to do so, especially if the sin involves leadership, would also be sin.  Jesus commands us in Matt. 5:23-24; and 18:15-20 how to biblically confront a brother in sin.

Confronting leaders about sin is taking a huge risk!  You might have to face the fact that acknowledging their sin may cause rejection.  Ostracism is alive and well in today’s church.

There may be hurdles you might face as a result of confronting leadership with their sin:

• They may try slandering your good Christian reputation.
• They may start gossiping about you to their wives and friends so that you will fall from the graces of the congregation.
• You may be accused of being unloving and judgmental for bringing sin to light.
• You might find yourself totally isolated from those in the church as well as the friends that you thought you had there.

In confronting sin, fear is natural because nobody wants to be rejected by their church body, especially leadership. Some concerns are legitimate.  Will leadership even listen to you?  Will they be receptive? What will become of you if they do not listen?  These are valid questions. Regardless, your primary concern is to obey Christ’s teaching in Matthew 5 and 18 and encourage repentance.

Over the years, there have been times when my wife and I have had to confront leadership about their sinful choices.  I want to say that we had positive results, but our admonitions did not change anything.  We were obedient to the Lord in confronting these men about their sin.  We made sure our words and tone of voice were carefully chosen.  We used Scripture to encourage repentance but to no avail.

You may have attended your church for quite some time and may even be a member or in leadership.  But if you are thinking about leaving your church, please consider the following:  If the leaders are not obedient to Scripture and not modeling Scriptural directives, you are obligated to confront them first!  No pastor or church leader is above God’s law.  Give them a chance to repent.

Here is a personal example.  For about nine months, my wife and I did all that we could to encourage our pastor’s repentance (the main problem) and his elders for allowing the false doctrine of “egalitarianism”[1]  into our church.  After our initial meeting, which this pastor and his two elders requested, they did not want to meet again.  Nor did they make any attempt to correct all parties involved. So, we sent several letters in follow up. The leadership took one to three months to respond to each letter!

In addition to ignoring our concerns, they accused us of gossip, hypocrisy, and unloving the fellowship by not being able to live in unity with the members who were promoting this false doctrine!  Therefore, we invited leadership to begin church discipline against us, as Scripture would command them to do if their accusations about us were true. They did not, most likely out of fear, because the church would find out that their leadership accepted people with aberrant doctrine and allowed them to function as leaders in the church. We also think they chose not to pursue church discipline because the congregation would find out how reprehensibly they had treated my wife and me in that first and only meeting. This meeting became a tag-team interrogation effort! The pastor headed up the indictments, with his best friend/elder eagerly waiting for his turn to get in on the action. By the way, this elder didn’t even read what I had written them about the issue, nor did he know what egalitarianism really was! He was more concerned about backing up his best friend, the pastor. During our grilling, the pastor became very irate with me because he had been able to keep his friend’s egalitarian beliefs hidden for ten years. He had successfully kept his church ignorant of this false doctrine. So, when I found out about it, he became incensed and wanted to know how I came about the information.

If they had initiated church discipline against us, their gossip, scriptural hypocrisy, secrecy, and the shameful way they treated us would have been exposed. They did admit that they did not personally agree with egalitarianism but did not consider it a false doctrine but just another “worldview.”

After many months of writing letters admonishing the leadership to repent, we took another step in biblical confrontation and wrote letters to the deacons about the pastor’s and elders’ sin.  At first, one of the deacons agreed with us that egalitarianism was false doctrine and suggested we meet with the deacons as a group.  But another deacon had alerted the pastor after he had received our letter, and our meeting was shut down.  At the pastor’s request, the deacons chose to meet with the pastor (the main guilty party) and elders first. After that, they never requested a meeting with us. 

We have never heard from them since, and the same problems are being allowed to continue to this day at this church.  The pastor and his elders sabotaged our efforts so that their sin would not be uncovered.   After a month or so of not hearing from anyone in the church, we knew that after being faithful members for two years, they did not care about us or their repentance.

All in all, the pastor and his two elders involved their wives, deacons, and the deacon’s wives in the cover-up of their sin.  As leaders, they did nothing to stop the infiltration of false doctrine. Despite all this, the leadership also gave the couple who was spreading the false doctrine more leadership opportunities because they were close friends of the pastor!

We tried reasoning with them with Scripture for over nine months, but they wouldn’t have any of it. Because of unrepentant behavior like this, I knew it was time to “shake the dust of our feet” from this church and leave.  We left not looking for greener pastures but for a church that devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, fellowship, communion, and prayer.

Two side notes; This pastor’s congregation gave him the time off and paid for him to get his doctorate under John MacArthur and Steve Lawson’s personal teaching Master’s Seminary. First, I highly respect and am grateful for these two theologians. But I wonder, if they really knew this pastor’s true character, would these two men have taken him under their tutelage?

How did this pastor pay his church back for paying and giving him the time to complete his Doctor of Ministry degree? As soon as he got it, he placed his resume on the seminary’s job list seeking employment with other churches. You see, he pastors a small farm church of about 150 people. With his doctorates now, he may get lucky and get hired for a much larger church or, better yet, get hired on as a professor at his alma mater, the Master’s Seminary.

The last side note is, he was telling pastors in our area about how hard his year was due to the “Robbins.” Yep, he says our last name, the “Robbins!” How do we know this? A pastor informed us that the above pastor came up to him without asking and told him how the “Robbins” had given him such a hard time during the year. I then asked, did he tell you why? This pastor said no. And this Doctor of Ministry accuses us of being unloving and gossips?

If you are reading this and feel appalled by the injustice of the situation, you are not alone.  It is astounding how many similar stories that my wife and I have heard from others.  Friends from all over this country have told us about their own church experiences involving pastors in great sin by allowing various evils in their churches.  Our friends were also accused of gossip when they had confronted their pastors!  In all cases, our dear godly friends were ignored and so poorly mistreated after confiding in their pastor that they had to leave their church!

Like most people, you are probably thinking, “Where is God in all of this?”  “Why does He allow such injustice?”  God is sovereign.  He does allow bad things to happen to His people.  But, for what purpose?  God puts our Christian character to the test.  The testing shows us our weaknesses and our strengths.  It separates the sheep from the wolves.  It divides those who rely on the Lord’s Scriptures from those who lean on their own understanding. 

Do not let fear undermine God’s Word and your obedience to Him.  If there is a sin issue among your leadership or congregation, you need to prayerfully confront it.  Doing God’s will is not always easy or comfortable, but obedience is what He desires most.  As you wonder where God is in all your difficulty, remember that He is patiently waiting to reward you for being faithful to Him and His Word. As the Apostle Paul wrote, “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Henceforth there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, will award to me on that day, and not only to me but also to all who have loved His appearing” (2 Timothy 4:7-8).

By Rob Robbins, March 2019, churchfm316.com

Editing and Proofreading by Laura Robbins

[1] Egalitarianism teaches that women are to share all offices within the church equally with men. This position holds that women can be pastors, elders, bishops, etc., and that male headship in the church and the family is invalid.